Mussels & Garlic Bread

There are so many times in life when I have to call an audible, and grocery shopping is no exception. I walk in with a game plan, telling myself this is the week I stay on track: Chicken on Wednesday, pasta on Friday, maybe something green to feel responsible. But let’s be real… more often than not, I still find myself in the drive-thru five minutes after leaving the store.

Why? Because after hauling every single grocery bag in one trip like I’m Hercules, unloading them like I’m solving a jigsaw puzzle, and playing fridge Tetris, the last thing I want to do is cook. And if I don’t eat something fast, the kind of hangryness that makes bad decisions look like genius ideas will kick in. That’s when I start questioning why I spent all that money on groceries when a large fries and a milkshake could’ve solved all my problems.

That’s why I had to create my “Hurry-Up Offense” meal: Mussels & Garlic Bread. It’s fast, flavorful, and makes me feel like I actually have my life together without spending extra money on food I didn’t need.

Here’s how it goes down:

1. Dump the groceries on the counter like I just won a battle.

2. Let the mussels take a salt bath at The Salty Spitoon (because they need to toughen up before cooking).

3. Put the groceries away while the mussels soak, resisting the temptation to rip open a snack like a savage.

4. Slice up a baguette, slather it in shallot/garlic compound butter, and throw it in the oven.

5. By the time the last bag is empty, the mussels are ready to hit the pan.

Fifteen minutes later? I’m eating like a king before my hangeryness tricks me into making bad choices.

🍽️ The Hurry-Up Offense Mussels & Garlic Bread Recipe

Mussels (Serves 1-2)

• ½ lb fresh mussels (cleaned & debearded)

• 2 cloves garlic, minced

• 1 shallot, finely diced

• 1 red Thai chili, chopped (optional, but adds 🔥)

• ½ cup grape tomatoes, halved or smashed

• ½ tsp garlic salt

• ½ cup white wine

• 1 tbsp chopped parsley

How to Make It:

1. Heat a little olive oil in a deep pan over medium heat.

2. Add shallots, garlic, and Thai chili—let it get fragrant.

3. Toss in the tomatoes, salt, and mussels.

4. Pour in white wine, cover, and let steam for 5-7 minutes until the mussels open.

5. Sprinkle with parsley and serve immediately.

Garlic Bread

• ½ French baguette, sliced

• 2 tbsp butter (softened)

• 1 shallot, finely diced

• 2 cloves garlic, minced

• A pinch of sea salt

How to Make It:

1. Mix butter, garlic, shallots, and salt.

2. Slather onto sliced baguette.

3. Toast in the oven at 375°F for 5-7 minutes or until golden and crispy.

This isn’t just food, it’s a game plan for survival. The perfect post-grocery haul meal that saves me from hunger-induced chaos and fast-food regret. So next time you’re standing in your kitchen, exhausted and on the verge of making a questionable food decision, call the audible, run the play, and eat like you actually planned this all along.

Always remember to scrape the plate

-Avery Ellis